Philadelphia’s Modern Baseball crafted a special place in the emo and indie rock scenes. Their 2016 album Holy Ghost, released on Run For Cover Records, stands as a powerful chapter in their story.
One of its standout tracks is “What If…”, written by Brendan Lukens. This song dives deep into personal reflection and emotional honesty.
The band formed while attending Drexel University, gaining traction with earlier records like You’re Gonna Miss It All. Their music often explores themes of youth, relationships, and future uncertainty.
Photographer Jessica Flynn captured the group’s essence in many live shots, adding a visual layer to their narrative. “What If…” remains a fan favorite for its raw vulnerability and relatable lyrics.
Key Takeaways
- “What If…” is a key track from Modern Baseball’s 2016 album Holy Ghost.
- The band hails from Philadelphia and rose in the emo and indie rock scenes.
- Brendan Lukens wrote this song, drawing from his personal experiences.
- Modern Baseball formed at Drexel University and released earlier albums like You’re Gonna Miss It All.
- The song is celebrated for its emotional depth and connection to listeners.
- Jessica Flynn’s photography often accompanies articles about the band.
- The track reflects common themes of youth, relationships, and looking toward the future.
Introducing “What If…” and Modern Baseball
With roots in Drexel University’s student community, the band developed a sound that resonated with a generation. Bren Lukens, Jake Ewald, Sean Huber, and Ian Farmer came together in 2012, creating music that felt both personal and universal.
Their style blended emo’s emotional depth with indie rock’s creativity. Elements of pop punk and folk punk added energy and authenticity. Early releases like Sports and You’re Gonna Miss It All showcased this unique mix.
The group’s journey began in Philadelphia’s DIY scene. They played countless house shows, including legendary nights at “The Michael Jordan House.” These intimate performances built a dedicated fanbase.
Their 2016 album Holy Ghost marked a significant evolution. Released on Run For Cover Records, it featured a unique split structure. Jake Ewald handled the A-side tracks while Brendan Lukens wrote the B-side.
This division reflected each songwriter’s personal journey. Lukens’s contributions explored mental health and addiction with raw honesty. His tracks offered a window into difficult but important experiences.
The band’s rise saw them graduate from basements to major venues. They headlined spots like The Fillmore, bringing their heartfelt music to larger audiences. Their connection with fans remained strong throughout.
In 2017, the group entered hiatus primarily due to mental health considerations. Members have pursued occasional projects and anniversary releases since. Their impact continues through these efforts and their recorded work.
Jessica Flynn’s photography beautifully captured the group’s essence. Her images often accompany articles about the band, providing visual context to their story.
Brendan Lukens’s writing on “What If…” represents some of his most vulnerable work. The track fits perfectly within his side of Holy Ghost, exploring personal struggles with remarkable openness.
| Album | Year | Label | Notable Tracks |
|---|---|---|---|
| Sports | 2012 | Lame-O Records | “Tears Over Beers”, “@ch03k” |
| You’re Gonna Miss It All | 2014 | Run For Cover | “Your Graduation”, “Rock Bottom” |
| Holy Ghost | 2016 | Run For Cover | “Just Another Face”, “What If…” |
This foundation helps us understand the context behind “What If…”. Next, we’ll explore the lyrics and meaning of this powerful track in greater detail.
For more insights into meaningful songs from this era, check out our analysis of Send Me An Angel by Highly.
Decoding the Lyrics and Meaning of What If… by Modern Baseball
Brendan Lukens’s composition stands as a raw confession set to music. The track dives into mental health struggles with remarkable honesty. It follows “Apple Cider, I Don’t Mind” on the Holy Ghost album.
Lukens wrote these words during outpatient psychiatric treatment. His experiences shaped every line of this powerful song. The result feels both personal and universally relatable.
Accepting the Need for Help
The opening lines immediately set a vulnerable tone. Lukens sings about realizing he couldn’t face his challenges alone. This acknowledgment represents a crucial turning point.
Many fans connect deeply with this theme of seeking support. The lyrics describe the relief that comes with accepting help. It’s a message that resonates beyond the music.
Lukens’s treatment period directly influenced this perspective. His time in care taught him the value of reaching out. The song captures this hard-won wisdom beautifully.
Personal Growth and Character
Another key theme involves personal evolution. Lukens explores how people change during difficult times. He makes an important distinction between personality and character.
The lyrics suggest that while outward behavior might shift, core identity remains. This idea offers comfort to those facing similar struggles. It’s about growth without losing yourself.
This perspective reflects Lukens’s broader journey on the B-side. His tracks on Holy Ghost often explore self-discovery. They form a cohesive narrative of healing.
A Touch of Sci-Fi and Personal Identity
The song contains unexpected science fiction references. These elements make the track feel uniquely personal to Lukens. He described it as feeling like the most “me” song on his side.
These creative choices add depth to the emotional content. They provide metaphorical distance while discussing difficult topics. It’s a clever songwriting approach that enhances the message.
This blend of personal confession and imaginative elements creates something special. It shows how art can transform painful experiences into meaningful connection.
| Theme | Lyric Example | Emotional Impact |
|---|---|---|
| Accepting Help | “I can’t do this on my own” | Vulnerability and relief |
| Personal Growth | “This change is part of me but not who I am” | Self-acceptance and hope |
| Sci-Fi Elements | Space and future references | Creative distance and metaphor |
Released on Run For Cover Records, this album received widespread praise. Fans particularly connected with Lukens’s honest songwriting. His tracks on Holy Ghost form a powerful narrative arc.
The band‘s ability to blend personal struggle with creative expression defines their appeal. This approach makes their music feel both authentic and accessible.
Next, we’ll explore how this track fits within the larger context of the Holy Ghost album and the group’s overall journey.
“What If…” in the Context of Holy Ghost and the Band
The structure of Holy Ghost creates a powerful dialogue between two distinct perspectives. This approach makes the album feel like a conversation between close friends. Each side brings different emotional weight and personal experiences.
Released through Run For Cover Records, this record represents a significant artistic step. The band worked with producer Joe Reinhart at Philadelphia’s Headroom Studios. Together they crafted a richer sonic landscape than previous releases.
The Divided Structure of the Holy Ghost Album
This innovative album splits neatly into two complementary halves. Jake Ewald’s A-side explores themes of loss and changing relationships. His songs examine how people navigate emotional transitions.
Brendan Lukens’s B-side addresses mental health and personal recovery. His tracks document lessons from outpatient psychiatric treatment. They form a cohesive narrative about understanding illness and addiction.
This division wasn’t just thematic but also creative. Each songwriter brought their unique perspective to their respective side. The result feels both personal and universally relatable.
| Album Side | Primary Songwriter | Key Themes | Notable Tracks |
|---|---|---|---|
| A-Side | Jake Ewald | Loss, relationships, change | “Note to Self”, “Everyday” |
| B-Side | Brendan Lukens | Mental health, recovery, growth | “Apple Cider”, “What If…”, “Just Another Face” |
Brendan Lukens’s Journey on the B-Side
Lukens’s songs document his time in psychiatric treatment. “What If…” specifically captures moments of self-realization. The track follows “Apple Cider, I Don’t Mind” in the sequence.
This placement creates a natural progression of understanding. Earlier tracks express confusion while later ones show acceptance. “Just Another Face” concludes the side with hope and resolution.
The B-side tracks feel particularly vulnerable and honest. Lukens described writing during this difficult period. His songs became tools for processing complex emotions.
This evolution in songwriting marked a departure from their earlier work. The group moved beyond their punk roots into more nuanced territory. Their sound became more expansive while remaining deeply personal.
The album’s release preceded the band’s eventual hiatus. Members cited mental health considerations behind this decision. Their music continues resonating with fans facing similar challenges.
This context helps us appreciate “What If…” as part of a larger journey. Next, we’ll explore how this vulnerable anthem continues impacting listeners today.
The Lasting Impact of a Vulnerable Anthem
Holy Ghost stands as a lasting testament to artistic courage in emo music. This record’s vulnerability created deep connections with listeners facing similar struggles.
The band reached new heights, headlining legendary shows at venues like The Fillmore. Their honest songs transformed personal pain into universal anthems.
Despite their hiatus, anniversary releases keep their spirit alive. Tracks like this continue fostering important conversations about mental health.
Explore their full discography to appreciate this group’s remarkable depth. Their music remains relevant for anyone navigating life’s complexities.
FAQ
What is the main message of "What If…" by Modern Baseball?
The song focuses on accepting vulnerability and asking for help. It shows how admitting you’re not okay is a sign of strength, not weakness.
How does "What If…" fit into the Holy Ghost album?
Holy Ghost is split into two halves, each written by a different member. “What If…” appears on Brendan Lukens’s side, reflecting his personal struggles and growth.
Are there any sci-fi references in the lyrics?
Yes, the song uses light sci-fi themes to explore deeper questions about identity and self-worth in a creative, relatable way.
Why is this track important to the band’s discography?
It stands out as a raw, honest anthem that many fans connect with. Its themes of mental health and personal change resonate deeply.
Who wrote "What If…"?
Brendan Lukens wrote and sings this track. It comes from his real experiences and emotional journey during a challenging time.
Has Modern Baseball played this song live often?
Yes, it became a fan favorite at shows. Its powerful message and emotional delivery made it a memorable part of their setlists.


